She's the barista slut.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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