You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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