I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
