North Korea, Best Korea!
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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