my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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