ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize