96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
