But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
