I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
