would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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