Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
