hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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