Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
