Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
