you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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