My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
