people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
me + whiskey = a bad person
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
