dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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