if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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