did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Randomize
