During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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