I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
