Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
