i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
