would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
