You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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