I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
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