You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
