do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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