Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
