Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
