So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
