We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
