So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
