hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
