i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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