oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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