Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
