i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I've blown a few things in my day
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
