FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
