some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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