He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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