I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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