don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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