Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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