she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
