Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
