can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
