In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
