I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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