I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize