i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
